the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize