Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Randomize
