But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
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