the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
