I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
