did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Randomize
