the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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