is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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