well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
