Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
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