HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Dick very happy bro
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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