One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Randomize