you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
