You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Randomize
