nut hugger
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
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