I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
