Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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