I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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