We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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