A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
