i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
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