How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
