Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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