Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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