i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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