There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
