He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
