The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
