love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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