did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
