I think I won the penis lottery.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Randomize