Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Randomize
