oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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