my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
So I just went to clothing optional bar
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
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