I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
