I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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