I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
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