We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize