I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
did i just pee glitter
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
