i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize