dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
