can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Randomize
