Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
