what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
