I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize