Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
