i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
