Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
