reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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