We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
