Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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